Reading Time: 5 Minutes
Back again for another edition of your favourite Frugal Samurai?
Of course you are!
What a difference a few days make eh, I mean following on from the previous post (read here), where I was around $3k in the hole from
gambling investing in the stock market – the market’s turned a fair bit and now my position is sitting around break-even.
Goes to show you how quickly the market can move up and down doesn’t it!
And you know they always say to “never” be emotional about investing, but there’s a reason why so very, very few people actually make money in the stock market consistently.
There are the chosen few among us who, like monks – sit under the tree of eternal peace from when they enter the position to when they exit.
But even the institutional and professional traders, even the very best – will tell you that, even they – get emotional.
Here, just have a look at my recollection of today’s movements and see for yourself:
10am market opens.
Hm, markets pointing to a small gain at the open. That’s alright, better than dropping, we’ll take it.
Sigh, might as well scan today’s news headlines… hmmm… “Mormon mum of six went viral blaming men for unwanted pregnancies“… good for her, wonder if I can do the same?
Damnit, this new work project is so effing hard – these clients can go shove it where the sun dun shine. Oh look it’s the boss.
“Love the new clients boss, project’s adding a lot of value”
Whew, that was close – hope he didn’t notice our screw-these-clients face.
Let’s have a quick look at our position… and it’s UP! Back in the green baby!
Think that deserves a freshly squeezed cold-pressed orange juice.
Back to it then. Let’s see now… oh wait… hang on, that OJ suddenly got me feeling all funny… did they use fresh, ripe, succulent Valencia oranges? Think Samurai THINK.
Nope, I don’t think they used Valencia oranges at all… in fact, it had a sour, almost bitter tast…but… but surely not – could they have used NAVEL oranges?
Sigh, calm, breathe in….breathe out… now since we’re here might as well check our position… WHAT! We’re up almost a grand! That’s what I’m talking about! FUCK YEAH!
Oops… got carried away in here, meant to keep it professional… especially in the men’s toilets.
Shit, shit all that dodgy orange juice, made us late for our client meeting. Quick, QUICKLY. We gotta get outta here.
Grabs laptop, folders, notepad.
Made it! Luckily the client is running a bit late also.
Let’s just review our meeting notes… ah fuck it – let’s have a look at our position instead.
Hmmm… WOW! BIG SMILEY FACE – WE ARE UP MORE THAN TWO GRAND. BAHAMAS* HERE WE COME BABY, IT’S YOU AND ME GRRRRRL, SOMEBODY’S GONNA GET PREGNANT WOOT! WOOT!
Oh here comes the client… compose yourself now.
Bugger, can’t focus – keep on thinking which airline to book for the Bahamas.
This meeting is going swimmingly though ain’t it. Let’s pretend to hear what he’s saying.
“… not happy…”
Look at that face, all red and worked up with passion… hmm wonder if there’s fresh passion-fruit in the Bahamas?
“… tell your boss to…”
I’ve always wanted to be my own boss I feel like telling him – blogger, entrepreneur, hustler.
“… moving to your competitors…”
I wonder which airlines offer the most competitive Bahamas tickets?
Boy, he could talk couldn’t he? He must be well satisfied with us to give his time for such a long and productive meeting.
Must report back to the boss and let him know we have one happy customer on our books.
But first… the position… let’s see… will it be business class or economy cla… oh look – steady eady.
Economy it is then.
Back at the office, just had time to grab a quick subway sub-of-the-day (toasted foot-long chicken strips with Italian herbs and cheese, mozzarella, all salads and lightly drizzled sweet onion sauce and a dash of pepper).
That was AMAZEBALLS – especially after the fake OJ debacle of this morning.
Let’s have a quick look…HUH?! BACK TO ONLY A GRAND? What’s this BS – get back UP you #&(@^.
Fuck this shit, so depressing.
Haven’t done ANY WORK since 230… fuck get up, GET UP.
Position: up a few hundred now.
GET UP YOU FKING TOFU.
Position: up a couple of hundred.
Position: up a… “Hey The Frugal Samurai, can you step into my office”.
“So Mr client called, he’s not happy, apparently you met him earlier today and he told you what he wanted from us to stop him from moving his business”?
Thank goodness boss got interrupted by an urgent call – had NO idea what he’s on about.
But QUICK, where’s our precious position AT?!?!
Position: down $250 – WHAT THE PONCY FUCK!!!
Position: down $176 – sigh, baked beans and toast for next couple of weeks…
Called back into the boss’s office – “yes sir, no sir, three bags full sir”.
403pm (market closes at 4pm).
Step out and IMMEDIATELY onto checking where we ended up.
Final position: Up $6
BOLT out the door, not looking back.
Someone, somewhere shouts “Hey TheFrugalSamurai we need you to…”
GONE before they could finish – must not be important.
Slam front door, ignore MrsFrugalSamurai and STRAIGHT into the shower fully clothed, turning only the cold water on.
No Bahamas! No money! No working for yourself! No FIRE! LIFE IS HARD!
Look, I may or may not have exaggerated some parts to this recollection – my memory is hazy at times.
For example, I usually shower with clothes off and I do prefer navel oranges in a crucial window between December to February.
But the rest of the day’s events seem to be how I
It just goes to show you that anyone can become emotional and erratic in their behaviour – especially when there is money involved.
If you think my actions today resemble borderline schizophrenia, then spare a thought for those traders, who are in and out of positions on a weekly, daily, hourly sometimes minutely basis.
But yknow, trading is not investing.
The timeline for investing would be different.
It would probably look like this.
10am market opens.
Glance at your position – you are up $400.
4pm October 30th 2058 market closes.
Glance at your position – you are up $4 million.
And fundamentally, that is the key difference between investing and trading.
When you’re investing – you take a cold, calculated, cunning approach for the long haul.
When you’re trading – you focus on the here and now… dreaming about the Bahamas.
Let me know which one are you!
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*We are not going to Bahamas. At this rate I’d just be happy to go to 7/11.
Firstly i thoroughly enjoyed reading that… finally got to see what it feels like to be a REAL MAN for once
Secondly you forgot one thing:
605pm – msg your friends/underlings (interchangeable) to “enquire” about their indoor soccer result… knowing FULL well they have a shite team and an emotionally unstable leader…
607pm – gets the emotional outburst from the captain that you craved for
610pm – goto bed well satisfied and fcloses mrs frugal (optional)
The Frugal Samurai
W…who are you talking about sir…
You’ve mistaken me for my friend, “The Cheap Ninja” I think…